maybe the day has come...

"and the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom."

~ anais nin

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steak sauce...

"marshall, i should feel tremors of psych-itude rock my body like a seizure. that was like a declawed, pregnant cat on a porch swing idly swatting at a fly on a lazy sunday afternoon."

~barney stinson, how i met your mother.


because the only way i feel sane after working all of these 14 hour days lately is coming home and putting on one of the HIMYM dvds i just got in from netflix while i catch up on my blog reader and remind my cats that i really do still live here...

and because barney is hilarious!

(and yes, i know i should be going to bed to catch up on my much needed sleep but for some reason... i just can't catch any good shut-eye lately...)

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suit up!...

"look at you, you beautiful bastard, you suited up! ...this is totally going in my blog."

~barney stinson, how i met your mother.

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adventures in VEGAS, march madness style...

"Las Vegas looks the way you'd imagine heaven must look at night."
~ chuck palahniuk


it's been awhile. i know.

between getting ready to leave for VEGAS last week and recovering/catching up from being in VEGAS this week, i've been busy. to say the least.

i promise i will update soon... until then, highlights from VEGAS:

• meeting Flava Flav
• watching copious amounts of basketball
• the M&M store
• cabana day (which involved 3 fifths of jager - straight from the bottle, endless bloody marys, and glasses and glasses of marshmallow & cokes - i'll explain that later...)
• hanging out in the boston cabana, the socal cabana, and the texas cabana
• getting invited to Flava Flavs birthday party
• the best limo ride EVER!
• watching some teams LOSE
• dancing, dancing, and more dancing... and then more dancing! (what can i say, i love shaking my ass!)
  
• making out with hot texas tommy!!!
• drinking for 15 hours straight - and i mean DRINKING!
  
• meeting some amazing people
• getting to experience VEGAS nightlife (and not so nightlife) for the first time!!!
  

and a few lowlights:

• those last 6 shots of absolut citron (probably could have lived without those...)
• losing texas tommy in the elevator
• my bestie getting mad because i ditched dinner one night (hey, i'm not a lawyer, attorney or doctor like most of the rest of the crew - i work in education, i couldn't afford ANYTHING on the menu, and i don't take well to charity, so sue me)
• watching some of MY teams losing
  
• being awake and drunk for 3 days straight hurts the next day...

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words of wisdom on this monday...

"i believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean."

"you say grace before meals. all right. but i say grace before the concert and the opera, and grace before the play and pantomime, and grace before i open a book, and grace before sketching, painting, swimming, fencing, boxing, walking, playing, dancing and grace before i dip the pen in the ink."

"the poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese."

"lying in bed would be an altogether perfect and supreme experience if only one had a colored pencil long enough to draw on the ceiling."

"let your religion be less of a theory and more of a love affair."

"i regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles."

"a room without books is like a body without a soul. "

~ g.k. chesterton

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the walking wounded...

i just watched the movie "the holiday" for the first time and i thought this monologue was fitting for the moment...

Iris: "I've found almost everything ever written about love to be true. Shakespeare said "Journeys end in lovers meeting." What an extraordinary thought.
Personally, I have not experienced anything remotely close to that, but I am more than willing to believe Shakespeare had. I suppose I think about love more than anyone really should. I am constantly amazed by its sheer power to alter and define our lives.
It was Shakespeare who also said "love is blind". Now that is something I know to be true. For some quite inexplicably, love fades; for others love is simply lost. But then of course love can also be found, even if just for the night.
And then, there's another kind of love: the cruelest kind. The one that almost kills its victims. It's called unrequited love. Of that I am an expert.
Most love stories are about people who fall in love with each other. But what about the rest of us? What about our stories, those of us who fall in love alone?
We are the victims of the one sided affair. We are the cursed of the loved ones. We are the unloved ones, the walking wounded. The handicapped without the advantage of a great parking space!
Yes, you are looking at one such individual."

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let me be forgetful...

"better by far you should forget and smile than that you should remember and be sad."

~christina georgina rossetti

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depths and seperations...

"ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."

~kahlil gibran

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then i realized i'd rather fight with you, then make love with anyone else...

this scene in "the wedding date" makes my heart swell up.  i want this...


KAT:  you know what pisses me off? 
i've been spilling my guts all weekend
and i don't know anything about you.

NICK:  i'm allergic to fabric softener. 
i majored in comparative literature at Brown. 
i hate anchovies.   
...i think i'd miss you even if we'd never met.

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the times, they are a changin'...

it seems like it was just a few mondays ago that i was reveling in the fact that #23 was going to come to visit.

and look how that turned out.

but this monday, i am happy to quote bobby d. because "the times, they are a changin'!"

and i have lots of people to thank... right now, top of the list is the ranger. he's coming out here to visit me in less than 2 weeks and i couldn't be happier!

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string together all the little things...

"hey, it's me, bailey. you don't have to use this in your movie or anything.
although, now that i think of it... fainting in wallmans does kind of qualify me as a loser.
but then again... wearing a price sticker on your forehead probably makes you one too.
you know, i don't know, tibby. maybe the truth is there's a little bit of loser in all of us, you know?

being happy isn't having everything in your life be perfect.
maybe it's about stringing together all the little things...
like wearing these pants... or getting to a new level of "dragon's lair"...
and making those count for more than the bad stuff.

maybe we just get through it... and that's all we can ask for."

~ bailey, the sisterhood of the traveling pants

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abstract expressionism...

"my painting does not come from the easel. i prefer to tack the unstretched canvas to the hard wall or the floor. i need the resistance of a hard surface. on the floor i am more at ease. i feel nearer, more part of the painting, since this way i can walk around it, work from the four sides and literally be in the painting."

~jackson pollock


happy birthday jackson pollock!

you have to try out this website... its fun, its art you can do at your desk during work, and its an ode to jackson pollock!

(thanks to maegan over at ...love maegan for this great find!!!)

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let's all just take a second...

here's the deal... i've been crazy busy at work (partly because of the time of year, partly because i am not going to be here this weekend, or the next...), as i've stated previously, i've been on a shitshow of an emotional rollercoaster lately, and i am so stressed out that i hurt physically.

therefore, all of the things in my head that i want to type... won't seem to expel themselves through my fingers at the moment. so let's leave it at this... i am SO extremely excited for this weekend!!! i am traveling for a volunteer position and will be at a conference all weekend in maryland (sounds exciting? no? not convinced yet?) and i will get to see some of my all time faves! some of the greatest, most amazing women i have ever met! and it is going to be a long, tiring, stressful, amazing, exciting weekend. and exactly what i need right now... although i will curse the time change with all of my being when i have to get up EARLY all weekend.

and finally, i am doing an extremely good job of keeping my head up amidst all the confusion and frustration and bad luck that is my life right now. and i can't really ask for more than that.

so with that said, i leave you with this... (a pic from one of the greatest scenes in one of my favorite movies "the wedding date", and one of the best quotes from that movie) enjoy!!!


"oh, god. i think i've just come."

~TJ, kat's (debra messing) cousin, after seeing nick mercer (dermot mulroney) for the first time.

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i don't want to be a rebound...

"love can’t be forced at will, it must be found, and that can only happen for real when our hearts and minds are free."

~ mike hardcastle

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my life is a work of art...

"i would like whatever it is that i'm doing - everyone's experience of me, everyone's interaction with me, everyone's discussion, conversation, relationship with me - [to be] an event within which they get to see who they are. i would make of my life a work of art"

~ john denver

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the scorpion and the frog...

have you ever heard the tale of the scorpion and the frog?

i've been ridiculously sick this week, and when i wasn't trying to manage through a day of work, i've been laying on the couch with my cats (which they appreciate after having been gone so long over the holidays) watching dvd's of the gilmore girls (some of you may know this is my all-time favorite tv show), this episode came on and when i heard this story again it hit me.

this is my family. well, my mother and my older sister. they are the scorpions.

i am the frog...

EMILY: Lorelai, stop this. I know you're upset. I know you hate us, but -

LORELAI: I don't hate you. Why would I hate you?

EMILY: Well, because we - because you thought we -

LORELAI: You were just being you. You couldn't help it.

EMILY: What are you talking about?

LORELAI: The scorpion and the frog. It's an old story. The scorpion says to the frog, "Hey, frog. Give me a lift to the other side of the pond." Frog says, "No way. You'll sting me and I'll die." Scorpion says, "Will not! 'Cause then we'd both drown." Frog says "Cool." So... scorpion gets on the frog's back, and frog makes it to the middle of the pond, and the scorpion stings him. As the frog is going down, he says, "Why would you do that? Now we'll both die." Scorpion says, "Sorry, it's just my nature."

[She points to herself] Frog. [She points to them.] Scorpion.

EMILY: I always thought it was a turtle.

LORELAI: Whatever it was. You guys couldn't help it.

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in-between...

"it was the in-between time, before day leaves and night comes, a time i've never been partial to because of the sadness that lingers in the space between going and coming."
~august, the secret life of bees


#23 and i were talking about sunset as he drove me to the airport this past sunday... it made me think of this. this is exactly how i feel (and how i felt) right then...

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love actually IS all around...

one of my favorite holiday movies... and one of the best dialogue exchanges ever. who doesn't love alan rickman's delivery of the line about having "lots of sex and babies"?!?!


SARAH: Harry?

HARRY: Sarah, switch off your phone and tell me exactly how long it is that you've been working here.

SARAH: Two years, seven months, three days and, I suppose, what, two hours?

HARRY: And how long have you been in love with Karl, our enigmatic chief designer?

SARAH: Ummm... two years, seven months, three days and, I suppose, an hour and 30 minutes.

HARRY: Thought as much.

SARAH: Do you think everybody knows?

HARRY: Yes.

SARAH: Do you think Karl knows?

HARRY: Yes.

SARAH: Oh, that is... that is bad news.

HARRY: I just thought that maybe the time had come to do something about it.

SARAH: Like what?

HARRY: Invite him out for a drink and then after about 20 minutes casually drop into the conversation the fact that you'd like to marry him and have lots of sex and babies.

SARAH: You know that?

HARRY: Yes. And so does Karl. Think about it, for all our sakes. It's Christmas.

SARAH: Certainly. Excellent. Will do. Thanks, boss.

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stung...

"after you get stung, you can't get unstung
no matter how much you whine about it."
~lily, the secret life of bees

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determined...

this quote hit me hard... i need to think about this...

"...and there was a new voice which you slowly recognized as your own, that kept you company as you strode deeper and deeper into the world, determined to do / the only thing you could do - determined to save / the only life you could save"
~ mary oliver

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